Monday, February 06, 2012

So everything's on a very temporary hold, publishing-wise, at the moment. It's all "business-related." There have been a few "i"s to dot and "t"s to cross, but things should be back on track sometime this week or next. Meanwhile, everything else is going very well! The new face of the Web site was launched on January 20, and I'm very pleased with it. I also had a complete and utter nervous breakdown about a week ago that had been building for years. Strangely, I have to say, it was an extraordinarily positive experience for me. I feel better now, more productive, more creative, stronger, more whole than I've felt in almost eight years! I hit rock bottom, and I bounced, flying up higher than I ever was, even when I began my fall from the clouds (I'm above them now, and the world looks fine!). I could blog about this experience at length, and I may do so at some point, in my Piece of Mind blog. For this blog, all that matters is that I'm feeling even more creatively uninhibited now than I was at the dawn of my writing career. When I was in my early twenties, I felt I could write about anything, any way that I wanted to write it. Nothing held me back. You may not know it from reading things like "Beater Rabbit," but I've been feeling quite repressed, struggling with the Church and its politics. Now that I've confronted that feeling, in a very dramatic way, and come through feeling fearless again, nothing can stop me. I am going to write with a freedom I've never allowed myself, even when I was an angsty twenty-something who was eager to write about things that challenged me, and things that frightened me. I feel no boundaries, and I see no boundaries, because there are no boundaries. I am back, and I am here to slay dragons! Should I find the dragon asleep, I will not tiptoe around to avoid an immediate conflict; I will kick it in the snout and wake it up, calling it to battle here and now; and I will emerge victorious!